This work by Phyto Hystrix is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.
Sunday, April 7, 2019
Eternity
In silence
coldness turns into warmth as eyes met
resurrecting hopes
The universe bursts into a million colours
as nightmares burned
and insecurities hushed
Infusing the heart with reasons, courage, and even more
So to vow to you in faithfulness, loyalty
Dear God, could this moment be eternal?
Make time stop
Make it stay this way.
Saturday, March 14, 2015
Braver
All hopes given up, feelings die, days change.
All memories that make the heart a whole , fall apart.
Swallowed, disappearing, though greater in number, less in significance.
The chill crawls up from the seabed like one reaching for air, grappling the bones by their very marrows.
Sooner from death merely by the second, if not taken down way up, only.
I release the chains that bind our hearts, I lose my memories to reality, given up.
If you looked up to the stars you'd see they reflected on the liquid black bed, upwards too high to reach for-down where you were; it sank.
They kill; reality and dreams both, one at any given time painful, another, because it never exists.
It's like straining your neck admiring the sight where another horizon glimmers a spell that owns souls.
And how you forgot, that here laying on the grass against your skin, when reality came it got harder with each recurring strike.
Except for one day when you finally grew braver.
Sunday, May 18, 2014
Entrance
I recorded my last videos of friends and the campus. I laughed at our silly jokes. I drove down the city streets we frequent on weekends, I let the smell of the sea linger in my lungs for quite some melancholic while. I kissed the sight goodbye. I shut the door to my old life, and entered another to my new one.
Now that it's a month past living life paying my own rent and soon, bills; I am fully aware of how his bare statement couldn't carry more truth. I didn't have the passion, I'd tell everyone I ever discuss teaching with. And now I admit to you, I went past the point where I learned of my actual degree of patience.
Kids nowadays don't remind me of my childhood at all. I couldn't recall my nervousness at scoring low marks in tests as I called out my pupils' names to return their Maths papers. I wasn't reminded of our being obedient at teachers' instructions and sets of classroom expectations as I instructed my pupils to stop wrestling so we could start the lesson.
You must remember all the talks I did here about my study and observation of classroom culture both in Sydney and back in loving home country. (Except if you have forgotten all because I haven't been writing much for months). And you too know, that the two situations are understandably different. Aussie kids are weetbix kids, one. They do as what their teachers tell, two. Malaysian kids aren't weetbix kids (doesn't have anything to do with it) and Malaysian kids react accordingly to the legitimate power their teachers exhibit.
Now Weetbix, my dear, was just my favourite brekkie when I was in Sydney. It has nothing to do with this post. I just embedded its slogan-as seen on the lid of its container-in this piece of writing, without receiving any form of commission; because I miss eating Weetbix (bathed in a bowl of luscious Oak chocolate milk). And in Cold Storage the price for a box of weetbix leaves a person of an average salary like me wailing. That fact tortures in addition to the absence of chocolate drink as sinful as Oak's in local stores. If there was any, I bet its price kills too.
Alright, where was I? Yes, kids. The difference between Malaysian and Australian classrooms, you have a general idea. The reality, I've experienced. I mainly assume responsibility over not exercising enough within my power to ensure acceptable behaviours are maintained in my classrooms. And allow me to justify myself; that was because, I didn't believe in the relation between quiet classrooms and effective lessons. I believe in constructive noise. And that was when the fire started.
Without even having to wait for long, the boys in my years 6 class semmed to have generated an idea that I wasn't serious about their learning and my teaching, so I feel. Reason I say so being, that they freakin' wrestle in my class. They use high-pitched voice to speak from their seats to me. They danced in front of my face. And I lost it all.
I treated them with kindness, spoke with soft, clear voice to instil an ambience of goodwill and sense of belonging in everyone's heart. I taught them to practice respect, that only one person speaks at a time and if someone must interrupt, that person must make the urgency known by raising a hand in acknowledgement of the person speaking. I urged that tolerance be upheld at all time and good manners in actions and words be kept in mind always. But what happened after two weeks astonished me and lit up the warning sign I kept on standby at the back of my mind. I knew it could happen, and it did.
I spent evenings after work reflecting on what's happening and if I was wrong in the first place to practice diplomacy. But autocratic classroom never had a place in my personal book of pedagogy. I made that choice when I was still a student teacher. If not that, then what? Why, I wonder, and what made the values known to be exclusive among Eastern families (that's us, fellow countrymen) waver over time? Back in my sociolinguistics class my teacher noted it time and over again, how it is known to all that easterners are obedient. It seem to me now she referred to a period of time that is gone.
My mind gets clouded fairly easily. Often, my emotions and professionalism stand on opposite grounds. I am now a teacher, my friend. And I will strive to deliver my best, I assure you always. In sha Allah.
Wednesday, June 19, 2013
How to Sound Like a Boss When You Ain't One.
Well that's one long title!
Oh hi!
My three weeks of semester break were spent travelling to and fro my home and grandpa's. Nothing much. So when my mother asked why I ignored Facebook, I simply answered
"I do the same thing every day in campus so whenever I got bored I jumped into the unreal life of Facebook. Now is the semester break, the time when I don't wish to see so much of what I see daily."
And so the cycle continues. Hello final semester of my study. Hello final semester of my study. FINAL. (Hurray!) So back is the life where Facebook has so much earned a respectful place. Contradictory to my perspective, my mother did make a good point when she mentioned how I could have simply missed many important things on Facebook, for example; announcements on our cohort Facebook group. My opinion, overlooking hers, is that nothing is of much value unless educational. You must have an idea now of how I have always overlooked the fact that social sites can also be educational. I have been regarding those as an exit to hectic study schedules, only. And that part about my unthoughtful classifying is unhealthy. You sweetie pies don't do that.
Yesterday I discovered a nice twitter profile where its owner and multiple admins take on what I regard as a community service of expanding the circle of English knowledge to as many people they can get-simply by being jovial clarifying word meanings and usages to people! Then I silently rationalised how mother was right when she said social sites can mean much more than just time-outs in between writing essays. 1-0!
On a similar note, throughout our course we have learned quite a deal about how teachers should be accommodating to children-and I tell you now that this is nothing near to easy to apply in real life situations. But we can try. Like those twitpeeps did. :)
Yes, back to what we were discussing. How to sound like a boss when you're not one. (My aspiration being aroused from how amusing I find people sound when they speak and write good English). You, my friend, have to know how my cohort mates and I enjoy playing around with words. We do this for fun. Why? Because I agree with what I saw on @englishjer 's profile. This-
Well of course that's true! But to much of our disappointment, the joy of wordplays most of the time is limited to conversational domains and not academic, making me feel like there are at least two extreme points of English discourse I am in: academic texts and non-academic texts. Texts here represent both print and oral.
Here, don't you think that proficiency plays a major role? Proficient language users have in-depth knowledge of how different communicational discourses shape people's choice of words, way of addressing others and stuff. In Malaysia, we have English as a second language. Highly crucial for workers to master. Fresh graduates' failure to get ideas across in English, as a matter of fact, is the number one factor that sees downfalls in our graduates' marketability.
And this all starts from one simple point: WE'RE NOT USED TO ENGLISH.
As a person who experience feeling demotivated by my lack of vocabulary and knowledge on idioms, I think the solution to this is nearer to us than failure itself.
How? (Why is my entry starting to sound like an advert?)
BY HAVING FUN SPEAKING ENGLISH!
Play with the language! Laugh at yourself trying to speak English. Get with your friends, mimic native speakers, sound weird, laugh it off, and repeat!
But it's also verrrrrrry important to make sure you have something to talk about. Yes, you can get the ball rolling by tackling English through humours, but seriously scroll down Youtube for the most recent happening-just so you can sound funny and make sense at the same time by having a topic to talk about. This is a point you must take note of in learning languages effectively. There must be a direction. It'll be your guide. You can't be navigating yourself to nowhere. So make a point that you find whatever that amused you as a subject for discussion the next time you meet you clique.
Ha. That's another thing. Your friends must be learning enthusiasts as much as you are, too. Then only you can find the time you spend joking around with your friends worthwhile. And being all out about your own learning is possible, if you are serious about getting there.
At present, me and my friends so enjoy making elaborate sentences either to condescend (jokingly of course) or describe matters. Someone starts making a statement that goes like "In my mind's eye, I don't see you as the kind of worker who will bring my company to a higher prospect." or "I see good personality, leadership and more being the good qualities in my employees. I don't see a trace of any of that, however; in you." in which an employer would use to dismiss a worker from a company. This unusual, unnecessarily elaborate way of saying "You're fired!" somewhat triggers our sensitivity to the features of the Queen's English, and how noblemen speak-which sounds impressive but inessential in 21st century's context. this is where the fun is, to us. The fact that we think while trying to form sentences like those slows down our speech pace, giving time for people to get the hint of what we're getting at, noticing how adjectives usually works best to add details while making the speaker sound fancy altogether. The good laugh we had usually came with a great deal of learning. Whew, that's one lengthy explanation isn't it. But the point is the speaker works at arranging words to sound good, and listeners notice how the speaker put words together to form sentences. It's not necessary to be correct. You'll get better with guidance, so who you talk with matters a lot. And focus on the sentence structure and functions of word classes as a guide.
Whatever way you choose to learn English, the point is to always see enjoyment as a goal. You want to learn English because you want to enjoy being able to understand and speak the language. Voila.
Credit goes to Min, Hanan and TQ for the example dialogues.
Byes!
Oh hi!
My three weeks of semester break were spent travelling to and fro my home and grandpa's. Nothing much. So when my mother asked why I ignored Facebook, I simply answered
"I do the same thing every day in campus so whenever I got bored I jumped into the unreal life of Facebook. Now is the semester break, the time when I don't wish to see so much of what I see daily."
And so the cycle continues. Hello final semester of my study. Hello final semester of my study. FINAL. (Hurray!) So back is the life where Facebook has so much earned a respectful place. Contradictory to my perspective, my mother did make a good point when she mentioned how I could have simply missed many important things on Facebook, for example; announcements on our cohort Facebook group. My opinion, overlooking hers, is that nothing is of much value unless educational. You must have an idea now of how I have always overlooked the fact that social sites can also be educational. I have been regarding those as an exit to hectic study schedules, only. And that part about my unthoughtful classifying is unhealthy. You sweetie pies don't do that.
Yesterday I discovered a nice twitter profile where its owner and multiple admins take on what I regard as a community service of expanding the circle of English knowledge to as many people they can get-simply by being jovial clarifying word meanings and usages to people! Then I silently rationalised how mother was right when she said social sites can mean much more than just time-outs in between writing essays. 1-0!
On a similar note, throughout our course we have learned quite a deal about how teachers should be accommodating to children-and I tell you now that this is nothing near to easy to apply in real life situations. But we can try. Like those twitpeeps did. :)
Yes, back to what we were discussing. How to sound like a boss when you're not one. (My aspiration being aroused from how amusing I find people sound when they speak and write good English). You, my friend, have to know how my cohort mates and I enjoy playing around with words. We do this for fun. Why? Because I agree with what I saw on @englishjer 's profile. This-
Here, don't you think that proficiency plays a major role? Proficient language users have in-depth knowledge of how different communicational discourses shape people's choice of words, way of addressing others and stuff. In Malaysia, we have English as a second language. Highly crucial for workers to master. Fresh graduates' failure to get ideas across in English, as a matter of fact, is the number one factor that sees downfalls in our graduates' marketability.
And this all starts from one simple point: WE'RE NOT USED TO ENGLISH.
As a person who experience feeling demotivated by my lack of vocabulary and knowledge on idioms, I think the solution to this is nearer to us than failure itself.
How? (Why is my entry starting to sound like an advert?)
BY HAVING FUN SPEAKING ENGLISH!
Play with the language! Laugh at yourself trying to speak English. Get with your friends, mimic native speakers, sound weird, laugh it off, and repeat!
But it's also verrrrrrry important to make sure you have something to talk about. Yes, you can get the ball rolling by tackling English through humours, but seriously scroll down Youtube for the most recent happening-just so you can sound funny and make sense at the same time by having a topic to talk about. This is a point you must take note of in learning languages effectively. There must be a direction. It'll be your guide. You can't be navigating yourself to nowhere. So make a point that you find whatever that amused you as a subject for discussion the next time you meet you clique.
Ha. That's another thing. Your friends must be learning enthusiasts as much as you are, too. Then only you can find the time you spend joking around with your friends worthwhile. And being all out about your own learning is possible, if you are serious about getting there.
At present, me and my friends so enjoy making elaborate sentences either to condescend (jokingly of course) or describe matters. Someone starts making a statement that goes like "In my mind's eye, I don't see you as the kind of worker who will bring my company to a higher prospect." or "I see good personality, leadership and more being the good qualities in my employees. I don't see a trace of any of that, however; in you." in which an employer would use to dismiss a worker from a company. This unusual, unnecessarily elaborate way of saying "You're fired!" somewhat triggers our sensitivity to the features of the Queen's English, and how noblemen speak-which sounds impressive but inessential in 21st century's context. this is where the fun is, to us. The fact that we think while trying to form sentences like those slows down our speech pace, giving time for people to get the hint of what we're getting at, noticing how adjectives usually works best to add details while making the speaker sound fancy altogether. The good laugh we had usually came with a great deal of learning. Whew, that's one lengthy explanation isn't it. But the point is the speaker works at arranging words to sound good, and listeners notice how the speaker put words together to form sentences. It's not necessary to be correct. You'll get better with guidance, so who you talk with matters a lot. And focus on the sentence structure and functions of word classes as a guide.
Whatever way you choose to learn English, the point is to always see enjoyment as a goal. You want to learn English because you want to enjoy being able to understand and speak the language. Voila.
Credit goes to Min, Hanan and TQ for the example dialogues.
Byes!
Friday, April 26, 2013
College Senior
Hullo.
I'm in my final year now. It's near the end of semester one, and soon we're going for practicum. My school's not a big one, we also did our research there so by now we've already come to know some of the office staffs well.
Ah the English teachers. At present there are six around, at times assisted (or distracted?) by pre-service teachers from our campus as we come and go. Well those finishing practicum this week are our juniors. We the seniors are only starting around... June. So you get the idea without me saying hopefully, that there are too few English teachers in the school, relative to the number of classes available. I think when it's our time it's gonna be a handful. Just look at the new teachers. They have too much in hand and for that, my warm regards to those teachers who work tirelessly around the clock regardless of the work burden they are trusted with.
That's about it on the school. I sure will update you soon in the next semester yes? Now let's talk about-sorry. I mean, let's read (you read, and I write) about the boring life of mine. Oh no here we go. Hystrix, those who claimed life to be boring actually haven't done enough to make it better.
Thanks for that friendly slap on the arm.
I haven't been doing my best to cope with works. I often find myself drained out of energy, but despite of that, my sweet friends and I managed to spice things up a bit. Thanks too, to those girls. :) We organised a tea party in college and invited our TESL juniors, that's the most exciting. Five of us with the help of other Cohort 2 girls aaand we had a magnificent evening with the junior sisters. We had tea of course, Australian Evening tea from TQ and peppermint from me (my favourite). You might not believe me when I say there were foodies, foodies everywhereeee. Cupcakes, mushroom soup, baguette, chocolate cake and biscuits and cupcakes and-oh I mentioned that. And these all made us come together for organising, managing and shopping-after some time of living our own lives since we came back from Sydney.
Definitely in many ways it's great to be home and in Penang. But there are also many good things about being independent in Sydney. Life there pulled us closer together, and we often organised events as much as we attended invitations from both locals and fellow Malaysians. Great time, of course.
Some seniors have just reached KL after their graduation in good Macquarie University. Some decided to stay a little longer and eat Doner's Wrap in our Campus Hub, go to Sydney Fish Market and what not. I envy. :p Yes we're here missing Macquarie so much and it at least made us feel better to see seniors' graduation photos. Next year let's hope we can be there too inshaAllah. Working hard.
Here are some photos of our twin university for you to have a look at, and for me to weep about in longing. I honestly miss this place.
Uh... what else do I have to say. Yes. Sorry I haven't been around to write things for you to read. I know some of you came and left frustrated (or at least that's what I thought) because I haven't put up any updates since forever. I hate me when I don't write. Pardon me please? I am living a disorganised college senior's life, and it affects everything-from reading to writing to blogging. Blogging is also writing but when I say writing that means my academic essays. They're all written to be submitted, not studied. I didn't feel that I engrossed in working on my writing like I seriously did in my third year. I wrote and submitted. Dull academic life, trust me. And to make it worse I left this blog where I leisure-write unattended for long. Pinch me if you must. Ouch!
If I could get advice from graduates about how to live and work better as a student, you know that you're more than welcome to lecture me.
Apart from other things- I almost forgot, it's difficult to park cars on campus due to limited parking space but yeah whatever-I am well. Just that I sometimes caught flu when I hadn't had enough sleep, and started to need more coffee at times. For all other things I'm excited about this year. You'd pray that I have a good final year wouldn't you? :)
Last. I love you. Oh and that reminds me of the many friends who tied the knot and more coming our way. You bet, I've been asked when I'm going to jump on the bandwagon for at least six times up to now. Go ahead, I'm okay here. You're around. I have everything I need for now, inshaAllah.
You, you and you. Thanks for coming. People like me should be grateful you still care to come and read. Haih. I can't guarantee to write consistently frequent, but I can promise you I'll try to do better.
The only paper I have to sit for examination will be on May 8th. Me and group mates finished microteaching this morning. Fun. And two more essays to go. Yup, that's all.
Get enough rest, don't turn into a panda like me. Do your assignments well and finish them early.
Hugs kisses bye love you. Assalamualaikum.
p/s: all photos are from my collection unless stated. All photo credits go to their owners. Thanks to Macquarie Uni, (they'll never read this) Che' Lah and Min. (they might read this) lol :)
I'm in my final year now. It's near the end of semester one, and soon we're going for practicum. My school's not a big one, we also did our research there so by now we've already come to know some of the office staffs well.
Ah the English teachers. At present there are six around, at times assisted (or distracted?) by pre-service teachers from our campus as we come and go. Well those finishing practicum this week are our juniors. We the seniors are only starting around... June. So you get the idea without me saying hopefully, that there are too few English teachers in the school, relative to the number of classes available. I think when it's our time it's gonna be a handful. Just look at the new teachers. They have too much in hand and for that, my warm regards to those teachers who work tirelessly around the clock regardless of the work burden they are trusted with.
That's about it on the school. I sure will update you soon in the next semester yes? Now let's talk about-sorry. I mean, let's read (you read, and I write) about the boring life of mine. Oh no here we go. Hystrix, those who claimed life to be boring actually haven't done enough to make it better.
Thanks for that friendly slap on the arm.
I haven't been doing my best to cope with works. I often find myself drained out of energy, but despite of that, my sweet friends and I managed to spice things up a bit. Thanks too, to those girls. :) We organised a tea party in college and invited our TESL juniors, that's the most exciting. Five of us with the help of other Cohort 2 girls aaand we had a magnificent evening with the junior sisters. We had tea of course, Australian Evening tea from TQ and peppermint from me (my favourite). You might not believe me when I say there were foodies, foodies everywhereeee. Cupcakes, mushroom soup, baguette, chocolate cake and biscuits and cupcakes and-oh I mentioned that. And these all made us come together for organising, managing and shopping-after some time of living our own lives since we came back from Sydney.
Credit: Mint Zulkifli
Definitely in many ways it's great to be home and in Penang. But there are also many good things about being independent in Sydney. Life there pulled us closer together, and we often organised events as much as we attended invitations from both locals and fellow Malaysians. Great time, of course.
Some seniors have just reached KL after their graduation in good Macquarie University. Some decided to stay a little longer and eat Doner's Wrap in our Campus Hub, go to Sydney Fish Market and what not. I envy. :p Yes we're here missing Macquarie so much and it at least made us feel better to see seniors' graduation photos. Next year let's hope we can be there too inshaAllah. Working hard.
Here are some photos of our twin university for you to have a look at, and for me to weep about in longing. I honestly miss this place.
 |
| Macquarie Theatre after a face-lift. Photo courtesy of Macquarie University on facebook. Jealousy at best |
 |
| Exterior of the newly redesigned Macquarie Theatre |
 |
| Entrance to our favourite library. |
 |
Library with some taste of art!
|
 |
Cosy work space
|
 |
Towards the entrance and exit of the library
|
 |
Where we lazed around while waiting for study partners
|
 |
Macquarie University Village (MUV), the students' residence once used for Commonwealth Games Village.
|
 |
Towards the Macquarie Uni Sports and Aquatic Centre (MUSAC)
|
 |
MUSAC
|
 |
Macquarie Theatre after dark
|
If I could get advice from graduates about how to live and work better as a student, you know that you're more than welcome to lecture me.
Apart from other things- I almost forgot, it's difficult to park cars on campus due to limited parking space but yeah whatever-I am well. Just that I sometimes caught flu when I hadn't had enough sleep, and started to need more coffee at times. For all other things I'm excited about this year. You'd pray that I have a good final year wouldn't you? :)
Last. I love you. Oh and that reminds me of the many friends who tied the knot and more coming our way. You bet, I've been asked when I'm going to jump on the bandwagon for at least six times up to now. Go ahead, I'm okay here. You're around. I have everything I need for now, inshaAllah.
You, you and you. Thanks for coming. People like me should be grateful you still care to come and read. Haih. I can't guarantee to write consistently frequent, but I can promise you I'll try to do better.
The only paper I have to sit for examination will be on May 8th. Me and group mates finished microteaching this morning. Fun. And two more essays to go. Yup, that's all.
Get enough rest, don't turn into a panda like me. Do your assignments well and finish them early.
Hugs kisses bye love you. Assalamualaikum.
p/s: all photos are from my collection unless stated. All photo credits go to their owners. Thanks to Macquarie Uni, (they'll never read this) Che' Lah and Min. (they might read this) lol :)
Thursday, January 24, 2013
Dissidia
The fight for apprehension on losing verdicts
The bidding of alibis on war torn lands
Tenebrous horizon draw blanket over our creaks
Synchronising gunshots to our aegis grand
We the citizens, your truth and your plight
Lest forget what commemorates your fight
Where the sun sets iron bars blind all sight
Where the sun rises they warm seats all night
Watch as gents in tuxes laugh in the face of our departure
And grey clouds sink our souls into bed-less river
How in sane words are our guns replacing God
Our beliefs a deception, and pure minds outdone
In reaching to you with a stroke to your heart
My bullet in your eyes, your fate almost mine
You alone are your life
And with us our keys to survive
They are not the ones of purebred drives
To trust in uncovering our strife.
*Hey hello! I wrote this in the bus on my way home for a short break. You there have a great week. :)
The bidding of alibis on war torn lands
Tenebrous horizon draw blanket over our creaks
Synchronising gunshots to our aegis grand
We the citizens, your truth and your plight
Lest forget what commemorates your fight
Where the sun sets iron bars blind all sight
Where the sun rises they warm seats all night
Watch as gents in tuxes laugh in the face of our departure
And grey clouds sink our souls into bed-less river
How in sane words are our guns replacing God
Our beliefs a deception, and pure minds outdone
In reaching to you with a stroke to your heart
My bullet in your eyes, your fate almost mine
You alone are your life
And with us our keys to survive
They are not the ones of purebred drives
To trust in uncovering our strife.
*Hey hello! I wrote this in the bus on my way home for a short break. You there have a great week. :)
Wednesday, November 21, 2012
Two Common Things
Assalamualaikum, and greetings.
Well two common things about this post and the time I have left in Sydney is; that they won't be long.
This post serves just as a friendly note to my dearest readers that I'm still around, I need you to forgive me for not writing for a long while, and that I will be back writing very soon, taking a few days to complete what I hope will be a commentary on current happenings of course. And maybe another about my reflection after about two years of living an 8-hours-flight away from home. Nah that's not really far compared to some others living continents away from home. But yes, wherever you are there's always something to learn about.
My stay in Sydney is coming to an end, in December my cohort friends and I will be making our way home to dear Malaysia. I still remember posting an entry when I was about to fly for Sydney. It was raining, I was writing it in my teaching college, and it doesn't feel like two years ago. But for relatives and good friends waiting in Malaysia, two years seems to not move at all, it's totally a different story.
I'm trying to keep this entry simple because I need to continue reading. But you know how I love keeping you reading my long entries, ehe! Okay not today. ;)
So if it doesn't take much of your time I kindly ask of your favour to say a little prayer for our fellow brothers and sisters in Gaza, Syria, Burma and everywhere. I will talk more, I know there's a lot about this to discuss, but later if you don't mind. In the meantime please pray for me and my friends too, some of us finished their exam, I'll be sitting mine on November 23rd, my blog partner on 26th. That should mean Whatever-Luna will be back with entries soon. Soon is whenever ideas strike. :)
Take care my sweethearts, see you very soon. Be safe wherever you are. Lots of love. :) <3 p="p">
Well two common things about this post and the time I have left in Sydney is; that they won't be long.
This post serves just as a friendly note to my dearest readers that I'm still around, I need you to forgive me for not writing for a long while, and that I will be back writing very soon, taking a few days to complete what I hope will be a commentary on current happenings of course. And maybe another about my reflection after about two years of living an 8-hours-flight away from home. Nah that's not really far compared to some others living continents away from home. But yes, wherever you are there's always something to learn about.
My stay in Sydney is coming to an end, in December my cohort friends and I will be making our way home to dear Malaysia. I still remember posting an entry when I was about to fly for Sydney. It was raining, I was writing it in my teaching college, and it doesn't feel like two years ago. But for relatives and good friends waiting in Malaysia, two years seems to not move at all, it's totally a different story.
I'm trying to keep this entry simple because I need to continue reading. But you know how I love keeping you reading my long entries, ehe! Okay not today. ;)
So if it doesn't take much of your time I kindly ask of your favour to say a little prayer for our fellow brothers and sisters in Gaza, Syria, Burma and everywhere. I will talk more, I know there's a lot about this to discuss, but later if you don't mind. In the meantime please pray for me and my friends too, some of us finished their exam, I'll be sitting mine on November 23rd, my blog partner on 26th. That should mean Whatever-Luna will be back with entries soon. Soon is whenever ideas strike. :)
Take care my sweethearts, see you very soon. Be safe wherever you are. Lots of love. :) <3 p="p">
Saturday, October 13, 2012
Staying Falling in Love
It's difficult to stay. Falling in love.
But falling feels so good you just want to keep falling. Down, down, deeper into this love. We're humans we have no wings. We can't fly. No, this isn't about surviving the fall.
It's plainly about falling.
Your heart shrinks. But you know it won't hurt, you won't break your backbone hitting the ground. No, it was promised. It's about the fear, and your facing it, and this bizarre; fear-facing exercise you're currently in. It just feels good, this falling.
Down and deeper.
The shrinking feeling slowly turns into something you struggle to describe, but enjoy so much. It's a mix of thrill, growing confidence, the want for more, and strangely...love. Strangely love.
The shrinking feeling now turns into that butterfly-in-my-stomach-like sense you have when you see your crush. Nah-this is way better. You recall gazing in admiration the face of your crush but you don't recall this very feeling with every glance. This is obviously something more special you just start to believe it's true. True love you call it now, unlike the previous others.
That feeling when you're giving your best to the ones you care about.
That feeling when you know you're safe because they're always around.
That feeling of never-ending excitement of seeing your loved ones again.
That feeling of winning a chess game with just another move.
That feeling of some cold sea breeze against your smile.
That feeling of watching the most beautiful sunrise.
That falling in love and never wanting to stop because you know it's going to be fine.
Have you ever felt that?
I did, so many times, but this time it's really different-unlike the many times I hated falling in love-this time I just want to keep falling,
because I'm falling for The One, I know He will catch me. His promises none unravelled to be other than truth.
Don't trust me, trust Him. Excuse me while I fall in love but you might want to take a step into this bliss you'll want to keep falling in.
But falling feels so good you just want to keep falling. Down, down, deeper into this love. We're humans we have no wings. We can't fly. No, this isn't about surviving the fall.
It's plainly about falling.
Your heart shrinks. But you know it won't hurt, you won't break your backbone hitting the ground. No, it was promised. It's about the fear, and your facing it, and this bizarre; fear-facing exercise you're currently in. It just feels good, this falling.
Down and deeper.
The shrinking feeling slowly turns into something you struggle to describe, but enjoy so much. It's a mix of thrill, growing confidence, the want for more, and strangely...love. Strangely love.
The shrinking feeling now turns into that butterfly-in-my-stomach-like sense you have when you see your crush. Nah-this is way better. You recall gazing in admiration the face of your crush but you don't recall this very feeling with every glance. This is obviously something more special you just start to believe it's true. True love you call it now, unlike the previous others.
That feeling when you're giving your best to the ones you care about.
That feeling when you know you're safe because they're always around.
That feeling of never-ending excitement of seeing your loved ones again.
That feeling of winning a chess game with just another move.
That feeling of some cold sea breeze against your smile.
That feeling of watching the most beautiful sunrise.
That falling in love and never wanting to stop because you know it's going to be fine.
Have you ever felt that?
I did, so many times, but this time it's really different-unlike the many times I hated falling in love-this time I just want to keep falling,
because I'm falling for The One, I know He will catch me. His promises none unravelled to be other than truth.
Don't trust me, trust Him. Excuse me while I fall in love but you might want to take a step into this bliss you'll want to keep falling in.
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