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Hummers, too.

...whatever you do, keep your intentions right; lillahitaala. He will guide you through the hardest paths and darkest days. Smile and fear not any hardship, for He's around. :)

March 3, 11.32 p.m.

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Saya kasih,saya cinta,saya sayang.



Kwasan R&R Kuala Kangsar,Perak. Malam 31 Ogos. Meriah dengan bendera!


Bandar Taiping tepat jam 12.00 tengah malam. Sesak sempena sambutan kemerdekaan.


Salam.

Kali ini suatu kelainan,saya akan cuba untuk manfaatkan penggunaan Bahasa Malaysia sempena bulan kemerdekaan dengan sebaik mungkin. ;)

Baru-baru ni kami diberikan tugasan untuk mencari bahan video berkenaan pendidikan. Saya terus melawat laman sesawang Youtube,rujukan terpantas. 'education in Malaysia' adalah kata kunci yang saya taip dalam kekotak 'cari' dan itu dia! Video yang tepat-satu slot dari berita Al-Jazeera dengan jangka masa hampir 3 minit. Agak pendek,kan? Tapi ia mencukupi. Video itu mengulas tentang pelaksanaan PPSMI di sekolah beserta dengan pandangan golongan pelajar dan guru-guru mengenai pelaksanaan dasar itu.

Sengaja saya lihat sudut komen. Aduh. Sungguh saya tak sangka. Dalam dunia moden sebegini,rupanya masih ada yang hidup dengan ideologi perkauman. Di sini saya tak mahu lagi menyatakan apa komen yang tertulis,rasanya tak perlu. Saya luangkan masa untuk berfikir sejenak. 'Kata-kata dari musuh adalah yang terbaik kerana musuh tak akan menyelindungkan kelemahan kita'. Setuju? Ini kata pujangga yang sememangya benar.

Sedarlah,sebarang isu,baik atau buruk di dalam pertiwi kita yang tercinta ini menjadi perhatian seluruh pelusuk dunia. Ada yang menyokong,tak kurang juga yang mengharap untuk meelihat kejatuhan bangsa kita. Bangsa kita,saya maksudkan kaum Bumiputra,Cina,India dan lain-lain,yang selama ini telah mewarnai sejarah Malaysia dengan warna-warna indah. Kenapa sekarang-setelah 52 tahun kita hidup bersama,kenapa sekarang harus wujud keretakan? Bangsa asing melihat kita dengan pandangan ragu,sedangkan kita berlari deras untuk mengejar kemajuan. Ya,benar kita dari Dunia Ketiga. Mengapa,Dunia Ketiga tak boleh majukah?


Banggalah kerana kita dari Malaysia.

Sahabatku,berhentilah meniru dan mengajuk budaya asing. Seraplah apa yang baik sahaja dan tinggalkanlah segala yang kurang manis. Mereka tahu kita ini berakar umbi Asia. Rambut hitam atau perang gelap,dan warna mata juga yang sama. Hentikan mewarna rambut dan menukar warna mata semata-mata untuk kelihatan seperti bangsa lain. Apa yang kurang dengan anugerah Allah ini,sehingga kita menukar kejadian-Nya? Sedarlah,mereka mencemuh. Mereka menganggap kita tidak setanding dengan mereka,'bangsa agung' yang hebat,tapi masih hendak meniru gaya mereka. Sedarlah. Saya benar-benar tersentak dengan apa yang saya baca di skrin komputer riba saya petang itu. Tak perlu sebak dan bertanya mengapa mereka sanggup memandang kita sebegitu rupa. Tanyalah diri sendiri. Mereka dengan kita sama sahaja,yang membezakan cuma ketinggian nilai budi. Saya sendiri,terus-terang,tidak ambil pusing dengan kata-kata cacian yang diluahkan encik itu. Dia sendiri sedang menunjukkan kerendahan pekerti bangsanya dengan merendah-rendahkan orang lain. Jadi,bahagiannya sudah selesai. Tapi bahagian kita belum. Bahagian kita belum. Cerminlah diri dan lihatlah realiti-sebanyak mana kita bangga dengan budaya mereka yang,maafkan saya,juga diserap dari bangsa-bangsa lain. Mereka tidak seistimewa kita,bangkitlah.


Melayu bangsa pejuang.

Melayu,suatu masa dahulu adalah bangsa pejuang. Sampai satu saat kita kehilangan tanah pusaka kita. Kita tuntut,kita tumpahkan darah untuk kembali berpijak di atas tanah Melaka. Tapi yang didapati cuma debu.

Sedarlah. Kali ini jika kita leka lagi,debu pun tak akan kita dapat. Kini,hiduplah bersama sahabat-sahabat kita,bersainglah dengan meereka,jangan wujudkan kepincangan antara sahabat yang berbeza warna kulit hanya kerana mereka bukan Melayu. Begitu juga harapan saya pada sahabat-sahabat ini. Saya terharu mendenga cerita Ayah,

"Tadi masa Ayah pegi cuci kereta,Ayah bersembang dengan sorg org Cina. Katenye,"

"Sekarang susah nak bali sayo kampung. Pucuk ubi dulu boleh dapat secekak lima kupang. Sekarang,susah."

"Ayah tanya,Melayu ke Cina? Katenye Cina,tapi dia dah lama duduk kampung Melayu. Memang boleh cakap Melayu."

Saya mencelah.
"Kenapa Yah?"

"Dia cakap Melayu fasih! Takde pelat lansung. Lagipun die guna perkataan 'cekak' tu,"

"Tu sukatan lama,"

"Ha tu le,tu Ayah tanya,"

Terharu,kan? Dan itu cuma satu contoh yang sempat saya kongsikan kali ini. Saya sendiri ada kawan-kawan berbangsa lain,baru-baru ini juga seorang kawan berbagsa lain menegur.

"Dah berbuka ke?"

"Belum,kejap lagi,"

"Ok,selamat berbuka..!"

"Terima kasih!"

Ringkas,tapi senyuman yang dilemparkannya cukup untuk membuat saya senyum meleret sampai ke bilik. Bahagia betul rasanya kalau saya dapat hidup begini selama-lamanya dengan kamu,sahabat saya yang sedang membaca coretan ini dan dengan mereka,sahabat-sahabat kita yang berbagsa lain. Cukup bahagia rasanya. Kamu tentu tahu,betul kan? Dan bahagia juga rasanya kalau kita dapat sama-sama menyanyikan Negaraku,di atas padang yang hijau,bukan debu.


Saya kasih,saya cinta,saya sayang.

Negara ini. Tanah tumpah darah Ibu saya,dan satu hari nanti darah saya. Kalau bendera jatuh di atas tanah sedang hujan turun mencurah-curah,mungkin ada yang berkata,

"Xpela...hujan kan? Basah baju aku."

Tapi kalau bendera kita,Jalur Gemilang jatuh di atas tanah sedang hujan peluru menderu-deru,mungkinkah kita sanggup,atau sampai hati berkata begitu?

Saya sendiri bukanlah seorang remaja yang cukup bagus,cukup patriotik untuk negara saya. Dan saya malu kerana ibu pertiwi ini telah melindungi saya selama 19 tahun,insyaAllah 20 tahun minggu hadapan,sebagaimana Ibu saya melindungi saya dari lahir hingga sekarang. Tanah air ini memberi saya air sepertimana Ayah saya memberi saya hidup yang sempurna dalam kesederhanaan. Saya malu. Andai satu hari tertakdir saya harus berkorban untuknya,darah ataupun keringat,saya halalkan atas tanah ini.

Merdeka ini,sayang,bukan cuma terlepas genggaman Jepun atau British dari jari-jemari kita. Merdeka ini ertinya dalam. Kebahagiaan,kebebasan,jaminan. Dan segala-galanya yang kamu boleh fikirkan. Harganya lebih mahal dari berlian. Kerana itu juga nenek moyang kita korbankan emas untuk kemerdekaan. Harganya adalah maruah,air mata,dan darah. Belum tentu terbayar,kalau kita terus mengagungkan mereka yang pernah menjajah kita. Bersahabatlah dengan mereka demi pendidikan,dan manfaat-manfaat lain untuk kemajuan. Dan selagi mereka menghormati kita sebagai satu negara yang berdikari,hormatlah mereka tanda kita bangsa berpekerti tinggi. Tapi ingatlah,jangan hilang jati diri sendiri. Ingatkan saya ini bila satu hari nanti saya terlupa. Bercakap dalam bahasa asing untuk kita bela Malaysia di mata dunia,untuk kita gambarkan indahnya tanah air kita,bukan tanda kita hilang maruah bangsa. Kecualilah kalau ia hilang dalam hati. Bukalah mata.


Saya kasihkan dia dengan sepenuh hati saya. Saya cinta dia dengan segala kebaikan dan kelemahannya. Dan saya sayang kalau saya terpaksa lepaskan dia.

Kalau kamu katakan ini pada dia yang kamu sayangi,mengapa tidak negara pada negara kita.


Saya kasihkan Malaysia dan segala isi kandungnya dengan sepenuh hati saya.
Saya cintakan Malaysia dengan segala baik mahupun buruknya.
Saya sayang jika satu hari saya terpaksa korbankan Malaysia,tanah tumpah darah saya.


Damailah roh-roh pejuang bangsa di syurga. Anak pertiwi sujud syukur pada Tuhan atas nikmat negara merdeka. Hormat pada Duli lambang kedaulatan tanah bertuah. Bangga dengan negeri yang hasilnya melimpah ruah. Sumpah dalam hati akan berdiri untuk Malaysia.

Merdeka!!!

Friday, August 28, 2009

Yesterday-it was love.


I typed half a page of note,and hit the button 'delete'.

Salam.

Another verse,which has been long since the last. Hope that the soul's back,for it left no inspirations back home that brainchild went drained without it.

My step is irrevocable
Once I see your lust tremble
You think you're at your best
Dear,you give me bold intimidation

I'm feeling bitter
No way much better
You might as well have drained the feel
Out of me,you're just being silly

Now seize the time
And our memories
The part of you
That's part of me

I want the time
For you to live

I want the time
For me to seek

You no longer and promise,
promise to leave.

That part of you
Will no longer be a part of me

But I want you to live.

Only now that I knew,that yesterday it was love when he sat by,a 'friend'. But that's when I denied,so gently I didn't even notice that he made his way to leave, so gracefully that he drew my breath out of my lungs with his pace.

Love,if only I knew that yesterday it was you.

Now that he's suffocating for another breath-for someone else whose shine shimmers on him a fainting hope-so dreadfully I can only watch,and cry out invisible tears. To keep my regret buried at the deepest of the seabed,and at the very least beg so he won't die. But he doesn't have a clue, -

That I myself am dying within.

Here's a stanza. (reconstructed,almost similar to the original one because I can't 'member the whole four lines of it.) It was accidentally created by my pal and me,(if you'd allow me to share the lines,pal,) while we were busy replying to each other's Skype status. Interesting. (To me.) Well do tell me if you like it.

Clouds are shaped to delay the stars.
-It can only hide them,never can it vanish them. For at least until dawn,
Still,after the darkest of nights,there'll be the dawn.
-And when the dawn comes,will the stars stay though they're unseen?

That's it,and I love it because it's beautiful,purely nature inspired. Well endorsed with images of the nature elements that stand out as moderate,not too overwhelming devices,though it was spontaneously created. That was within minutes of rapid typing war. (Banzai!!) Enjoyable it was,to have a 'Skype Status Battle'-I'd recommend it to those in favour of inspirations! I even see it as a stanza of an incomplete poem. (Posibble to be completed later,who knows.) See?

-WHAT??? Did I just write an analysis?! Definitely not again!

Do enjoy your day,and happy fasting! :D

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Ain't It Lovely?

Salam,give the day a hug,friend!

My thanks to Ms. TQ, a sweet blog mate for this,

A rule's a rule,yeah? The questions now,I present you.

Nicknames given by your friends

I am the one who give them nicknames. Em,mine are modified version of the nickname I got for myself,which are
  • Ferrfatinari,Sumi (Tahpape! But I love 'em. By the member of F1 Gang,Ex-JESSians. I love you forever and always!)
  • Stryx,Steghik,Hys (as called by my close friends in IPGM Penang,who feel comfortable by adapting the original 'Hystrix' into their Northern accents or simply self pleasure.)

Do you love your friends?
  • Erk,macam soalan kaunseling je. Do they love me? Sobs. Yes,I love my lovely friends so much cause they're lovable. And I hope that they love me too..


What do you and your friends know about yourself?
  • That I am studying TESL with them in IPGM Penang Campus. Ekeke!

Now what do you know about yourself,that your friends don't?
  • So now they'll know. Ok,here it is. What I know about myself,that my friends don't,is that 'I want my close friends to know me in and out so that there'll be nothing that they don't.' (Which shows that they care..agree? And that's a challenge only true friends are up to,I don't simply let 'em know...) I'm done!
What song best describe you?
  • None,or I don't remember,or I chose not to. Go for lines of the songs,inspirations lie there...Yuna's Dan Sebenarnya is an everyday played on the radio and my player,but its lyrics touches. The song's beautiful by the way,and I still can't figure out which song describes me best,though there are trillions of them on planet Earth.
Six friends to give this award to
  • are Raihan,
  • Teacher Mursyidah
  • and all my other blog pals,it's for you!
H-a-p-p-y...answering,give the day another hug! And Ms. TQ too.. :)

Sunday, August 23, 2009

Fill the sack 'till 10.50 pm!


This time let a photo first greet you! Now my greetings. Salam,hello there!

The weeks of late had loads of works to offer. That's one reason why this post's titled 'fill the sack'. (Imagine full sack of corns... ^_^) Other than that,21st August 09 was indeed a sack to fill.
I bought a night ticket back,it was due to arrive at 10.15 pm. As usual,15 minutes erlier. KPB is alway reliable, I told my friends as we eat Nasi Goreng Kampung at the station. It never arrives late. Haha. *nods of heads*.

We had plenty of time to eat and enjoy the drama series 'Nur Kasih',their favourite (I rarely watch tv in IPP so I can't say it's one of my favourite drama,no.)
Finishing the meal,I suddenly break the silence,or their concentration of watching the drama.

Me: We,ak nk pg surau jap,korg tlg tgk2kn beg blh?
Sazrah and Julia: Ah,ah. Pg je ah,jgn kacau ktorg nk tgk tv.
I laughed,knowing that their 100% concentration were on the tv screen,eyes 'sticked' on it. Then we rose,and made a move with Abg Ensem for my company. I crossed my way in front of them,adding to the disturbance. Haha!

It was almost 9.30 pm by the time we left the surau. The time left were used to walk around,buying mineral water for each of ourselves,I got myself a Kit Kat bar. One of my favourite travel companions!
Before we head downstairs for our buses,I requested to take some photos with these friends. With our fully loaded bags stuck in between the elbows,we decided for the lift to do the honour of taking us downstairs-and as usual-lifts nowadays are well equipped with mirrors. I wonder why? But we utilized it. For taking photos!


Sazrah,me,Nadia and Jujue smiling at ourselves. -_-

With a click,the lights went out. Almost like a movie,ain't it? For real,I'm up to no jokes. I uttered a spontaneous response;

Aw...this is what I hate most.

(in the dark,unable to see any of my friends.)

I think it would be better if they had smiled,I would at least have a clue of where they were standing. Ngee...!! ^-^
Then we realized that we were trapped,yeah,t-r-a-p-p-e-d in the lift. I did notice that it took some time for the lift to open even if it was only one floor down to the platforms. In the 'gubra' situation we managed to stay calm as I,being the nearest to the buttons,flashed my phone lights (eiceh...my phone,to its master's rescue!) towards the buttons,in attempt to look for the 'open' button. I found it,and pushed it,realizing that I might see just a flat wall,unlitted by any single rays of light should we the lift had not reached the ground floor. Alhamdulillah,it had.
The door opened and the lights simultaneously came back to our sight.
Phew!

I,having not lost the spirit of photo taking at the time,blew out a loud 'hah'! And laughed. My typical sign of relieve. So these were their faces,explaining the seconds of heart-stopping (peh!) incident. If you are to say "Sangkut lif je pun,"; I'd say "Tinggal bas kang,x ke naya?"

Jue: Hystrix saje je bt rilek!
Me: Aku try je,kot mau bukak,nasib ah, (padahal same je saspen,)


Jue,re-telling the story to the press reporters. I mean,to the victims. (who went through the situation with her? Hehe,joking!)


Sazrah's face explained it all. Gasp! It's ok,Sazrah,it's over now.

Sazrah and Nadia then made a move to their platform. They took the same same bus which was scheduled to depart at 10 pm. But I didn't know if it arrived on time,I couldn't see the platform from my place. Mine was due at 10.30 pm,so I spent th time chit-chatting with Julia. As we chat,I learned that her bus would be arriving at the same time as mine. Goodness,we had each other's company. Minutes passed,there were no signs of buses heading to platform 11,nor 12. I took out my ticket,she took out hers. We were both worried that we got the wrong platform.

Me: Kt ni dah msk kategori makhluk teraniaya nih..apesal bas lmbt sgt?
Jue: Ntah,cube check tiket.

*double check*

Me: Weh,ngape nombor bas kt same?
Jue: Hah? (flipping her ticket) Biar betul,ah ak tkt slh bas!
Me: Ape plknye,
Jue: Tiket ak kaler kuning,ko lain,sape slh bas ni!
Me: Xkan le slh bas kot! Die yg tulis mcm ni? Same bas kot,ko kate company lain2 kan? Ni ejen je ni,
Jue: Aaa...kang ak sampai Bangi kang,ak duk umah ko.
Me: *grins*

A snory while later...

It's the...B-U-S!!

Konsortium Pelancongan Bumiputera. Melancong tu... Together with two other IPGM PP students,we boarded the bus,red carpet awaited. Ache..! Real nice bus!


Jue's relieved face upon having confirmed that the bus wouldn't take her to Bangi. It would carry on,to Malacca...her hometown..and even Negeri Sembilan! (otherwise I'd spend the first week of fasting with her as a guest!)


This is the scenic view from my wide....window. I sat a single seat,2A. It would be best if you had viewed it 'live'. The picture isn't as astounding as the real view of the floating city at night.

This is the earlier photo above there,it's actually the Penang Bridge. Breathtaking...isn't it?!

I thought that a night journey would be a bore,with no clear view out of the bus,no lights to shine the pages of my 'delayed digest,the RD,' and no nothing. But it was all the contrary. It was amazing,I hushed to myself that I am lucky to have the chance of living on the island of Penang. And I wished that I had shared the moment with my best friends,and that I wasn't the only one gazing...

So fellows,enjoyed it? Have a great holiday,and my Ramadhan greetings for you. May you be blessed in the blissful month,amin!

Friday, August 21, 2009

Tense the Ar-t! Out of You!

Howdy doodie,doing fine?

Tonight's topic will be; 'Tense Forces Out the Art in You.'
Fellow readers,the story goes like this.


My workstation,a new one in Parlour..no,Pala.

I was bored,and felt that it'd be fine to spend some time to ease the tense of having half a tonne of workloads,

This...is something that suddenly appeared next to my lappy. Want a clearer picture? Scroll down,pal.

See it? It's a picture of a sea dragon. A mythical creature I fantasized in my mind and made exist on a piece of paper-which I snatched from my printer's paper deck nearby.

Ain't it true? Tense 'draws' out the 'drawer' in you. (@_@)??? No,not that drawer of yours which you use to keep your stuffs in back home..
I drew,after almost two years since I last drew a picture. It was a war goddess drawn way back in 2007,an inspiration for this blog of mine,luna-stella. It's an amateur's,but it's my first successful piece of drawing which I love.


........
.....
....
...
..
.

Anybody remembers what should be finished tonight?
Ah yes.

There,to write a newspaper article,ES coursework assignment. Think I should do nothing better than to get back to work.

But..hey,that's not enough to even call it a piece of 'goreng'! And 'goreng' doesn't work with ES by the way.




*crickets*

Right,you go to sleep,I'm finishing my article. Good night,and thanks for reading.

Sunday, August 16, 2009

Sunday Morning Tag.

Hello there! See,here's another tag from my friend who lives with a pastime of playing invisible drums whenever he feels like it,Mr. Stai. Not to worry,he's not alone. Not me,sure not! The boys... Now enjoy!

FOUR NAMES THAT FRIENDS CALL YOU :
  • Fatin
  • Hystrix
  • Stryx
  • Steghik (Utagha na! Ade ke patut! Hais..xpele..)
FOUR MOST IMPORTANT DATES IN YOUR LIFE :
  • 15th April
  • 28th April
  • 12th September
  • The dateline of submission. (Of assignments.)
FOUR THINGS YOU’VE DONE IN THE LAST 30 MINUTES:
  • greeted myself and the world (silently)
  • spoke with my mother
  • tidied up my bed (Hotel style. Eiceh..!)
  • em,thought about what I'm going to do in the next 30 minutes.
FOUR WAYS TO BE HAPPY :
  • listen to good music
  • talk to my parents (most loved ones!)
  • drive a GOOD car to good spots. And that good car would be my own Optimus and that good spot would be Bt. Ferringhi, Weld Quay,all around Penang.
  • find a way to be happy. I will be happy in the process. ;p

FOUR PEOPLE YOU MISS FROM YOUR PAST :
  • Geng F1 (past carried to the present.)
  • Teacher Halleyza
  • Sharifah,a long lost best,best...friend.
  • Abang Fairuz-a brilliant Medical Lab Technologist,most respectable senior for his personality and ability to laugh in Anatomy class. (I laughed for only once. And hated the scent of ammonia entering my mouth the minute I laughed. Ukh..!)
FOUR GIFTS YOU WOULD LIKE TO RECEIVE:
Wuish,ni kalau bgtau ni,belikan ye? Wii..!
  • Anything,even a small gift of memory from my parents.
  • A...pot of flower plant. I love to keep plants! Gimme one!
  • A miniature of a Ferrari from Schumi. Which will end up with me unable to sleep for three nights upon receiving it.
  • A sleek Ferrari,which is ridiculous. That's not even a gift! It's...I don't know,but I'll be excited to death within seconds after landing my fingers on its steering. Seriously...
FOUR OF YOUR FAVOURITE HOBBIES :
  • Driving.
  • Sightseeing.
  • Writing...anything.
  • Capturing photos,whenever I have the chance.
FOUR PLACES OR COUNTRY YOU WANT TO GO FOR VACATION :
  • Maxwell Hill,Taiping Perak.
  • Langkawi Island, Kedah.
  • Scotland.
  • Japan!
FOUR FAVOURITE DRINKS :
Sorry,for this one,I've always wondered too..what's my favourite drink? I spent years trying to figure it out and finally I succeeded with a splendid answer. I HAVE NONE. So not wanting to disappoint you...here are some drinks I often enjoy.
  • Skype juice. I mean,sky juice.
  • Orange juice.
  • Neslo (it's difficult to find nice Neslo. But my father and I have identified some spots to go for good Neslo. And it includes home!)
  • Teh tarik le!
FOUR THINGS ALWAYS FOUND IN YOUR BAG/HANDBAG :
It varies to time and purpose,so I'll take it during a long journey
  • A notebook
  • A black pen. Never in my life did I own a blue pen.
  • Sunglasses. 8)
  • Err..coins?
FOUR FAVOURITE COLORS :
  • Black
  • Yellow
  • White (and that makes a Perak state flag,hehe!)
  • Dark blue
TOP FOUR HANGOUTS :
  • QB
  • Putrajaya
  • Bt. Ferringhi
  • Home!
TOP FOUR U LOVE SO MUCH :
  • Ibu
  • Ayah
  • My relatives (one at a time,taking turn from the eldest to the youngest. If not,it'd make 400,not 4. ;D )
  • Ah,this space is available for another one. Anybody? *crickets*
TOP FOUR “THINGS” SPECIAL TO YOU :
  • A key. It's special because it's the twin key of the car,and it keeps me reminded of how much I love the family.
  • My CQ,without it blogging means nothing...
  • Cool Stuff. What? It's my plant. Yeah,I name my plants!
  • My Nk 6300.
TOP FOUR WHO YOU WILL TAG:
  • Raihan Msjy,my good friend!
  • En. Naqib,whose blog cheers me up most of the times,
  • Max J. Potter,an inspiring teacher
  • En. Labu,whose birthday differs mine with just one digit. (I just knew it last month.)

Happy tagging,and have a great day!

Friday, August 14, 2009

To whom you can call a 'friend'.


It has been quite some time since then..good day to you.


I'm now recovering,alhamdulillah. A brief update on my current condition,that was.

Fellows,my dear. If you'd allow me,I have plenty to share,-as I've said that if it's possible,I'd share my moments-come hell or high water-with you.

Now let this not be another post full of wordplay,shall we?


While I was unwell friend,while I was unwell,I could do nothing much on my own. Being in such a state gave me another task in hand,though,it didn't leave me alone to rest my eyelids. That was to observe and learn,and learn...which was not that easy.

To be frank I was deeply hurt and in the same time touched by the reality I had to learn. And I have no intentions to make the fuss out of the matter here,let it be my own lesson. I prefer it that way.

Dear,when you're sick,you do need help. Let alone when you've kept it to yourself long enough till you finally have no choice when suddenly it struck you with shocking consequence. And I am very sure that you understand how it'd feel like when you're badly unwell...the possibilities aren't limited. Everyone would have experienced this,even just for once in their lives.

At the time when I went through this unbearable stage,I requested for no 24 hours observation,no such things. But for something far more reasonable,for I believe I deserved a friend being there when I need her to at least buy me some medicines...and nothing more.

Friendship isn't something we create within seconds,

it is
SOMETHING YOU BUILD WITHIN YEARS OF TRUST,LOVE AND CARE

which grows stronger day by day.


But what happened to me the day I needed a friend most,and that's when the friend turned back against me,made me think twice.


I questioned myself about the belief I had lived with all my life. That friendship is something you can rely on,and what does the word 'friend' really means.

I would like to end what I've started. To everyone who prayed for my recovery,may Allah shower you with His blessings. Again,a bunch of thanks to my dear parents, Azlan, Zalia, Asyikin, Wida, Ms. TQ, Raihan, En. Stai, and all my friends.



I am driving my heart home,to whom I can call 'friend'.

Sunday, August 9, 2009

A message to leave,before I leave.

Salam and good day.

Received a phone call from my parents informing about my blood test result this noon. The medication I've been taking is no longer working,or it had failed to function. This ain't something normal and I'll be on my way home (obviously not the one driving) Monday evening,the latest will be Tuesday morning.

For all the time I have been not well,last evening I felt even more painful. No,not because of the pain itself,of course it is one of the reason. The other is rather frustrating,that adds up to the pain.

How I can count my fingers for the number of friends who really care... Dear Allah,how hurtful it is to see...to take this... I understand,perhaps I don't look sick enough. But I don't enjoy collapsing in front of others even if it's possible in my current condition,I'm sorry.

Keep on ignoring me,it'll make me feel better,and heal faster.

For the time being,enjoy your life. Excitements aren't there to let go,my friend.

As for me,this is the time when I get to know who my true friends are. Thank you for those who stay. And for those who don't,this may sound terrible to you,maybe you'll say that I'm definitely ridiculous,just heating up the situation,or simply rude.

Before that imagine how it feels like for me. And tell me how you would react,how frustrated you would be,if it were you.

Take care.