2011 hit its seventh day. I'm not writing any 'Happy New Year Peeps!' post-in fact this is an ordinary entry that kicked in the draft box on the fourth day of the new year, and gets published on the seventh. So how has it been going for ya? Well every year we make a new wish as I do too, but I think what's more important rather than renewing wishes every year; is putting them into reality. Because visions will be left as manifestations of fantasy if no serious actions are taken in realising them. Above all the point is, renewing goals every year is a good practice, if enforced with proper deeds towards making them happen. Yeah you know, action speaks louder than words so come, let us make our dream a reality today, because nobody can tell if there would be another tomorrow.
In 2010 three of my friends left. It made me think that something about the world nowadays have changed a lot that life is no longer too easy to predict. Anyone can leave regardless of their age, and it doesn't matter if you have achieved what you aim for. My friends who passed were all of the same age as me. Their death really marked a scene in my diary. It made me realise, that there are so much I haven't done just yet. And if it's not now, I don't know if there will be another year-because nobody sees the future.
The recent phone call I received from a close friend about the death of our dear girl Cha, tore me apart. It has been three wasted years until I finally get to hear her name again, and that's when she's no longer around. Personally I am left to ponder about what I have done, or could have done. While she was around, she had been a splendid companion, a wonderful friend, an evidence that unconditional love does exist. The memory of life in matriculation; while we were together, were our sunshine. I, on the other hand, disregarded my responsibility as a friend. Upon knowing I trembled into tears and hated myself for being so careless. I came to a resolution that I need to admit the mistake and make a good lesson out of it. yes, it sure did cause a great deal of pain. You know the feelings of losing a best friend when you would never hear her voice again.
Being a friend isn't as simple as saying it. It's as difficult as being one. But for someone who would do anything for you, who would place your head on her shoulder when you cry, who would laugh at your jokes and share your bed for pillow talk, why can't you do the same? Why is it difficult for me to be everything she is to me? Oh she meant a lot of things, she was one of my sunshines. I could've been her sunshine too. But when it's time I wonder if I was. If I have done her what she deserved.
Being a friend is not as easy.
Ayah,Ibu, all my family members, and friends. This year I aim to be more affectionate, to be more sensitive. Because you mean the world to me.
Al-Fatihah:
My grandma;
Hasmah
And friends;
Rumizah Rosman (Mija, SRK J6 '01)
Abdillah Hafiz (Dillah, IPG KPP '10)
Fatin Noraishah (Cha, KMPk '07)
You fought your way bravely. I love you more than I can say.
Everyone, have a blessed year and make a change in your life. In everyone's around you too, for the best. Be their sunshine.